My dad called right after I hit "publish post" on Friday ...

The tumour was very big - 60mm, apparently. And the spread into the lymph nodes is extensive. So my mom's prognosis without treatment is really poor.

The question is, what's the prognosis with treatment?

My parents have decided that it'll be better to be treated in the UK. Apparently they have a broader range of treatment options there. And my aunt is there, for support, and various other relatives. So they're flying out there on the 24th, arriving on the 25th. I'm waiting for the travel agent to call me back - he's cancelled my ticket to SA, and is looking for flights to London for around the same time period.

My mom'll see her doctor on the 26th, and she (the doctor) will have set up scans so they can see if the cancer's spread to my mom's bones, or liver ... And then they can decide on treatment options. On the one hand, if the cancer is very advanced, it may be better to forgo chemo and die feeling healthy. But if there's a chance that chemo could buy her another couple of years then of course that would be the way to go. The mother of one of my friends was diagnosed with stage IV cancer in 1984, chose aggressive chemo, and lived till 1988.
Two weeks ago I wouldn't have believed that four years could seem like such a wonderfully long time. It's so bizarre, my mom feels perfectly healthy right now. Except for the aftereffects of the mastectomy. How can someone be terminally ill yet feel healthy?

The weekend was hard for me. The kids had a climbing comp down in Miami - it should have been fun for me too, but obviously it wasn't. I cried all the way down there. The tears just keep coming. It was good for me to be at the comp. though - being around other people helps. Academically I know this, but my natural instinct is still to shut myself off and hide - it seems like too much effort to try to socialise in a normal way. Yet, it helps ... People are being so sweet - we've got quite close with some of the other team parents, and it's good to know that they'll help out with the kids while I'm away ... Between them, and other friends, and people from church, our family will be looked out for while I'm away.

Another friend has found a sitter for the kids while I'm away. She's the girl they normally use, so I've met her before - she's a college student, and will be perfect as she's very easy-going, kind, lots of energy, lots of fun ... She'll come here every day between 9 and 4, so she can take the kids to the pool, or climbing, or to the movies, or to visit their friends. We decided this would be better than putting them in camps - this way, they get to choose what they do, rather than having a schedule imposed on them. Plus, it'll be easier for Bobby - no fetching and carrying, and he won't have to get into work late or leave early.

As for the competition itself, Emily did very well : she came in third in Florida, which means she gets to go on to the Divisional competition on June 19 in Atlanta. Poor Stephen did not make the Divisionals. He is pretty disappointed, but is being a good sport about it. Because he's in the 14/15 category, he had to do all his climbs on lead (which is where you clip the rope in as you go along, rather than being top-roped - much harder and also much more dangerous.) He took a fall on his last climb and has a horrible rope burn on his leg - it's huge and incredibly painful. Yet, he still wanted to go back to the gym on Sunday morning and try a couple more climbs!