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Thursday, May 24, 2007

What a hellish day.

It was our long-awaited appointment at the French Embassy in London today, so the five of us presented ourselves there, on time, and armed with every conceivable piece of documentation. (Bobby and the kids have South African passports, so they need visas in order to travel to France).

When we finally left the embassy at five this afternoon, after hours and hours of waiting and fruitless argument, begging and pleading, Bobby had a visa in his passport, and the children did not. Apparently the standard birth certificates that the South African government issues are not good enough for the French. Good enough to get the children US visas, good enough for the Dutch to issue them a Schengen visa in 2001 - a visa which, I might add, allowed them to visit France as well - and good enough to get settlement visas to live here in England. But not good enough for the French.

The problem with the kids' birth certificates is that they don't list us as parents. So there's no direct proof that they are in fact related to us. We went to the South African High Commission to see if they could organise something for us and they said yes, we could get an unabridged certificate - but it'd have to come from Pretoria, and it'd take four months.

Not much help to us, then, since we are supposed to leave for Paris on Sunday. So, no visas for the kids.

And you know what's so fucking unfair about this, is that if you come from North America, or Britain, or Australia, or New Zealand, you don't need a visa at all. If you come from anywhere in Africa, though - or anywhere at all third-world-ish - then it's a different story. Seems like thinly veiled racism to me.

I am incredibly disappointed and frustrated and sad about this.

Our first instinct was to cancel the trip altogether. It's something we've looked forward to, as a family, for so many months now. There's so much we want to share with the children ... so many memories we would have been able to create...

But, my parents have offered to look after the children for us here, so that Bobby and I can still make the trip. As they said this afternoon, it won't be the same without the children, but it will still be a good trip. Just not the trip we'd planned. They are pretty darn amazing, my parents. And so are my children. They are bitterly disappointed too, but none of them is being whiny or sulky about this whole fiasco. Instead, they are planning things that they can do with their grandparents next week. I am really, really proud of them.

11 comments:

dee said...

Those are the best proud parents moments...the ones when your kids, faced with something difficult, really rise to the occasion and show what great people they are turning out to be.

Anonymous said...

Oh I am so sorry for you guys :-(

Flora said...

Crazy crazy stuff.

Yay for your parents!

Jo said...

oh annalise :(

i am so sorry, what an incredible disappointment and how angry i would be too :(

hopefully once you get things settled with the paper work, you can take another trip to France all together.

have a great trip, Paris is one of my favourite cities. any specific plans?

madre-terra said...

Not so thinly veiled racism, eh? Jeepers!!!
Amazing kids, too.
Just stick to Jane's mantra..."It's Okay".

Unknown said...

Oh, annalise and all. How sad. It seems awfully unfair. I'm so impressed with you all for moving ahead and the kids for being so mature about it. Hope you and Bobby can have a great trip regardless.

Anonymous said...

Sorry. So unfair. Your kids are really impressive.

Lisa said...

I'm so sorry about the trip. It is good to know the kids we raise are actually impressive people though, isn't it. Glad your parents are helping out.

Anonymous said...

That has brought a tear to my eye, what wonderful children you have.

Bloody Frenchies!

Anonymous said...

So sorry to hear that...glad to hear that your kids are able to handle a blow like this so well though...you are right to be proud.

I'm impressed by how you are handling this (maybe that is why the kids reacted that way) - that you took your parent's advise and are trying to still make something good out of this. I'm "always" in the process of learning that...redirecting and adjusting my previous plans/hopes/expectations and not letting unexpected occurrences ruin things.

Hugs,
Angela

Anonymous said...

perhaps get another Dutch visa :P and then use it to go to France again?
At any rate, I hope you enjoy France.
Reminds me of a line I heard in movie trailer recently, "We don't mean to be rude. We're French."